Dear Best Friend,

I find myself asking myself why?
Why do I reach for the things I reach for?
Why do I seek solace in them? What am I seeking solace from?

I know the answers are there.
Sometimes, they’re as clear as day and sometimes, they’re not.
But it’s a process and that’s okay.
Sometimes I’ll forget the answers, other times I will remember.

The only constant is change and choice.
What choices are we choosing to make right now?

Does it heal us? Does it allow us to press pause for a bit?
To build something? To bring joy?
Instead of trying to get to the ‘why?’ (which is such a big question),
I’m choosing to re-frame the questions.

To take the pressure off.

Is there comfort in the pain?
Where is the pain located? In my belly? What does that mean?
Roots. Safety. Security. Expression. Nerves.

Observe. I am observing.

Why are patterns or habits that are carried out through certain behaviours hard to break? What is the block that’s stopping me from breaking it?

It’s not the easiest but I am doing the best I can right now and figuring it out. One small step at a time.

What if it’s possible? What if I Can?

Till next time,
M